November 16, 2005

The "root" of evil...

Just before logging on, I was ranting and blabbing away because I was so pissed at my grandmother. Like most Filipino families, I live with an extended family. As the only "single" apo (grandchild) left, I have the fortunate-unfortunate task of living with my grandmother. Don't get me wrong, it's not that I don't love my grandmother, we just don't get along. At all. Anyway, what was so darned annoying is the triviality of my annoyance this started with pandesal. I don't get the idea of having to lock up food in her room refrigerator where it is so inconvenient to get some when we have a big one in the kitchen. I never got the concept of "our" food in regards to the maids. In the Philippines, most homes have maids and for some reason, there is a clear distinction between "our" food and "their" food. This is something I can never understand...anyway, it pissed me off that she refused to listen to my point about it being inconvenient and difficult, as well as insulting, that she has to keep the food away for fear that the maids take it. For me, it's just food. And I'd like to believe our maids are not that trivial that they'd risk thier jobs for a piece of bread, right??? So there I was ranting and raving when I read Doubleknot's blog on getting mad. It made me think of a comment my friend made just last night.

I've been out of commission for a few days because of a horribly, terribly painful toothache. I had gone in for a simple dental procedure when my dentist accidentally hit a nerve. Although it is a possible side effect or complication that occurs, it doesn't erase the fact that I was in extreme agony. I actually am still in quite some pain now and the difficult part is that pain relievers are not offering much relief anymore. My nerves are screaming for morphine!!!! In the height of my suffering, I said "what have I done to deserve this torture???" my friend replied: "it's karma for your evilness". When I asked her to explain, she said it's karma for my inability to hold my tongue. She said this was a reminder that I need to keep my tongue in check because I tend to let it get the better of me. When I stop and think about it, she may be right, hehehe. I guess for me, my mouth is "the root of all evil"...and though I am not saying I will not verbalize my anger anymore, I can try to be a little more cautious in ranting away...after all, the tongue can be a double edged sword. Likewise, once hurtful, angry words are said, it can never be taken away.

2 stars twinkling:

doubleknot 11/17/2005 06:18:00 AM  

I know how it is with grandmother's - no one was able to get along with my grandmother but me and one aunt. I did it by just asking her what she wanted. I couldn't change her so I just went along with what she wanted - it didn't bother me.
I am so sorry to hear about your dental problems. It is no fun having something wrong with your teeth. I do believe that pain in the mouth is the worse you can have. I hope you are on the road to recovere now. Nice to hear from you.

doubleknot 11/17/2005 03:03:00 PM  

Forgot when I left a comment the other day that I wanted to comment on the karma idea. I am a firm believer in what goes around comes around. My ex-husband left me with nothing - married a woman he had been having an affair with - they bought a beautiful doublewide trailer - almost like a house - he had a motorcycle, a truck, a van, he opened his own buisness - sounds wonderful dosen't it - today he has nothing. He lives with his mother when he doesn't have money to pay rent some where and the only car he has is a small one so he will get good gas milage. He is going from one job to the next. All this because he did the same thing to his new wife - I feel more sorry for her. I hated him for a long time but with help I was able to over come that feeling and realise all I had to do was wait - and so that is what I did and I would hear from one person then another how low he had gotten. He lost every thing. I may not have much but at least with my room mates help we pay the bills and are content with our lives.

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