January 25, 2006

If you only knew...

If you only knew what lies behind this painted mask, you would understand. You'd understand that there's so much left unseen.
If you only knew what hides behind the shadows of my smile, you would see it isn't there. You'd see the tears left uncried.
If you only knew that behind the shield of this warrior lays a scared little girl who's too afraid to admit she can't....
she can't let go...
she can't be brave...
she can't keep on pretending...
but till then, inside she shall remain,
hidden from the truth.
Hiding from reality.
Struggling to break free.

3 stars twinkling:

doubleknot 1/26/2006 04:47:00 AM  

The face we show the world and the face we have inside often aren't the same. Like you I have to be brave and go on even though it is hard and sometimes it feels like no one understands - my sister is the closest person to understanding my pain. I am sure there must be at least one person who cares about you if you open yourself up to them.

doubleknot 1/26/2006 09:10:00 PM  

Just wanted you to know that the clouds seem to be lifting off of my soul. I know if I just hang in there things will get better. No matter what my mammagram and my knee doctor come up with I think I will be able to face it.
I hope you will see the sun shinning - lighting the way for your soul to follow soon.
There are a couple of other blogs that I read that lift my spirits. They are country blogs - I do miss living in the country buy it is not possible for me anymore.
Hope you feel better soon.

doubleknot 1/28/2006 10:59:00 PM  

Dogs can be a real comfort - they love you no matter what. Mine always seemed to sense when I was feeling bad or hurting. I hope you are feeling better soon. I am trying to get myself out of this gloomy feeling - so much seems to be going on right now with doctors for me and my room mate - he gets his shoulder operatered on soon and it will be in a stablizer for six weeks which means I am going to have to be around to help him only my knee doctor wants to operate on my right knee this time - my room mate and I are managing - he went with me to the store for the first time since he fell and it really tired him out. We have to set the groceries on the porch then go up the stairs - one at a time - and carry the food in from there. I hope you feel better soon. Give your doggie lots of pets and attention and he will comfort you.

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